The emotional pain and torment of a breakup can be difficult on even the toughest guys. You would probably prefer physical pain over what you may be going through. At least you would have some sort of idea of how quickly you would heal and a doctor could tell you what to do to speed the process. The torment comes from knowing exactly what will end your pain. If your girlfriend or wife would simply give you a second chance then the path to healing would be simple. You would have something to do. You would have a goal and you would come up with a plan to bring the two of you back together again.
Whether you were married to the woman that you love or she was just your girlfriend, the pain is no different. The healing process and the process of restoring your relationship should also be no different. Women are women and whether you had a piece of paper saying that you would be together forever or not, there was probably a time when both of you said or wished that you would be together until the end of time. Getting over your pain, rebuilding your self-confidence and getting her back will be the same no matter if we are talking about a wayward wife or girlfriend. It also doesn't matter what is going on in her life. It doesn't matter if she is with some other guy or not. You will see that these methods which are loosely based upon what is suggested to get a combat soldier through stress will help you to get your ex back more quickly than you might otherwise think.
There is a process that men use when they come out of combat that is called debriefing. You will use this same process to remove the emotions from what happened in your relationship. You'll look at everything factually and without emotion. You should allow yourself a grieving process before this but try not to get too caught up in these feelings of pity, remorse or sadness. As you debrief yourself, you will recount what happened, what you did wrong in the relationship, what you did right and what your ex did all in a very factual manner. You will understand what you could have done differently but you will not dwell upon this or beat yourself up for any mistakes that you may have made. There is nothing that you can do about the past so you will simply be learning from your mistakes at this point.
Learning from the past is the only purpose it serves. Feeling bad about yourself or what you did will only continue to hobble your attempts to win your girlfriend back. It serves no useful purpose. You need to let go of the past and learn from your mistakes. Consider yourself lucky that you had this experience to learn from. Once you have successfully debriefed you should feel free from guilt, doubt, pain and torment. You will be moving forward with a clean slate and you will be able to focus on the future again.
The next step involves get some rest and relaxation. Just like combat veterans who have seen battle, you need a little bit of time to blow off some steam and live life a little. You have seen your share of hell, you have put it behind you and now it's time to remember what life is all about. You have survived and you will get that second chance with the woman you love. Be happy about that and celebrate. Today is the first day of your new life and it's up to you to decide what direction you will head in. Begin by doing things that bring you joy or make you feel good about your life.
Avoid the temptation to go out and get drunk with your friends. This might be what your friends suggest but more often than not, alcohol will depress you and make you slide back into the mourning process. You will be tempted to contact your ex. Your mind will play tricks on you and you might be tempted to call your ex to let them know that you're doing well or that you still love them. Resist this temptation and put some distance between you and your girlfriend or wife. Go for a short trip or spend a weekend away from your home town. Find a place that is serene or which distracts you from everything that happened before, during and after your breakup. Getting away from the things that remind you about your ex is important right now.
When you return, it will be time to rebuild yourself and your life. You must focus on your mental strength, your emotional strength as well as your physical body. Take advantage of this time apart from your girlfriend or wife. Take a closer look at how she behaves, acts, feels and loves. Learn a little bit about female psychology and begin to understand why women behave the way that they do when they're in a relationship. Look at this as intelligence gathering. We, as men, are logical and calculating in how we perform tasks and solve problems. Women are emotional and driven by their feelings and instincts. Once you understand this, you will be better prepared to win her back in a stealthy yet effective manner.
You might still be filled with fear or doubt right now but if you think this plan through you will understand that it will work. Removing the emotions as well as the blame for what happened and getting to work on yourself is the fastest way to get your girlfriend or wife back. Focus on what you can do instead of what you did in the past. It is a waste of your time and energy. The sooner you regain your confidence and self-esteem, the sooner you will be able to win her back. If you prolong this process and allow yourself to feel horrible for another month or so, you will be kicking yourself for wasting time. You have some work to do but the reward will be getting your ex back in the shortest time possible.
Whether you were married to the woman that you love or she was just your girlfriend, the pain is no different. The healing process and the process of restoring your relationship should also be no different. Women are women and whether you had a piece of paper saying that you would be together forever or not, there was probably a time when both of you said or wished that you would be together until the end of time. Getting over your pain, rebuilding your self-confidence and getting her back will be the same no matter if we are talking about a wayward wife or girlfriend. It also doesn't matter what is going on in her life. It doesn't matter if she is with some other guy or not. You will see that these methods which are loosely based upon what is suggested to get a combat soldier through stress will help you to get your ex back more quickly than you might otherwise think.
There is a process that men use when they come out of combat that is called debriefing. You will use this same process to remove the emotions from what happened in your relationship. You'll look at everything factually and without emotion. You should allow yourself a grieving process before this but try not to get too caught up in these feelings of pity, remorse or sadness. As you debrief yourself, you will recount what happened, what you did wrong in the relationship, what you did right and what your ex did all in a very factual manner. You will understand what you could have done differently but you will not dwell upon this or beat yourself up for any mistakes that you may have made. There is nothing that you can do about the past so you will simply be learning from your mistakes at this point.
Learning from the past is the only purpose it serves. Feeling bad about yourself or what you did will only continue to hobble your attempts to win your girlfriend back. It serves no useful purpose. You need to let go of the past and learn from your mistakes. Consider yourself lucky that you had this experience to learn from. Once you have successfully debriefed you should feel free from guilt, doubt, pain and torment. You will be moving forward with a clean slate and you will be able to focus on the future again.
The next step involves get some rest and relaxation. Just like combat veterans who have seen battle, you need a little bit of time to blow off some steam and live life a little. You have seen your share of hell, you have put it behind you and now it's time to remember what life is all about. You have survived and you will get that second chance with the woman you love. Be happy about that and celebrate. Today is the first day of your new life and it's up to you to decide what direction you will head in. Begin by doing things that bring you joy or make you feel good about your life.
Avoid the temptation to go out and get drunk with your friends. This might be what your friends suggest but more often than not, alcohol will depress you and make you slide back into the mourning process. You will be tempted to contact your ex. Your mind will play tricks on you and you might be tempted to call your ex to let them know that you're doing well or that you still love them. Resist this temptation and put some distance between you and your girlfriend or wife. Go for a short trip or spend a weekend away from your home town. Find a place that is serene or which distracts you from everything that happened before, during and after your breakup. Getting away from the things that remind you about your ex is important right now.
When you return, it will be time to rebuild yourself and your life. You must focus on your mental strength, your emotional strength as well as your physical body. Take advantage of this time apart from your girlfriend or wife. Take a closer look at how she behaves, acts, feels and loves. Learn a little bit about female psychology and begin to understand why women behave the way that they do when they're in a relationship. Look at this as intelligence gathering. We, as men, are logical and calculating in how we perform tasks and solve problems. Women are emotional and driven by their feelings and instincts. Once you understand this, you will be better prepared to win her back in a stealthy yet effective manner.
You might still be filled with fear or doubt right now but if you think this plan through you will understand that it will work. Removing the emotions as well as the blame for what happened and getting to work on yourself is the fastest way to get your girlfriend or wife back. Focus on what you can do instead of what you did in the past. It is a waste of your time and energy. The sooner you regain your confidence and self-esteem, the sooner you will be able to win her back. If you prolong this process and allow yourself to feel horrible for another month or so, you will be kicking yourself for wasting time. You have some work to do but the reward will be getting your ex back in the shortest time possible.
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