A quick session of lovemaking due to the man's inability to control himself can be frustrating to a woman. No surprise that one of the most popular searches on the net is for tips to last longer in bed! A fast finish to physical intimacy can deny the woman the satisfaction which she gets from lovemaking. She might decide that her husband either does not love her or that he is unloving. And a man who reaches climax too soon sometimes feels like a disappointment to his partner.
As you can imagine, this is not helpful for the couple's relationship, especially if the topic is never openly talked about. In most cases, however, the guilt produced by sexual problems is massively stressful, and the man and woman frequently carry on with this important topic unresolved. So if this is happening to you, what can be done? The great news is - you can indeed change things!
Step 1 - you must talk about it from your heart: in other words, you tell your partner what you are feeling. Unfortunately, in reality our research proves as few as 10% of couples talk to each other about difficulties with lovemaking. So, to help you discuss your thoughts, feelings and emotions around sex, we have some tips to assist you:
1) Talk about your feelings - please don't try the tactic of avoiding responsibility by blaming your partner. Being able to listen openly without reacting emotionally means you will meet much less stress - and your partner is probably going to be much more able to hear what you say without getting angry.
2) Don't project your feelings - having the courage to accept that you are in this together is essential to eliminating mutual anger and mistrust. Only when you are able to accept that your partner's actions and feelings are a real response to the situation, and that they have a right to feel that way, can you start to respect each other as you truly are.
3) Don't engage in self-criticism. Putting things right is more constructive. This may involve getting the help of a therapist. Or it may mean something as basic as making a time slot each week to speak to your wife or husband about what is "up" for you.
4) If you have difficulty discussing sexual problems rehearse the things you want to raise before you start. Being prepared is essential in achieving the respect of your partner. It's also important to know what is unacceptable to you in any discussion about sex. That way you are be much more likely to avoid concessions you regret.
5) Be clear about what you are saying. It's often difficult to work out what's causing our thoughts and feelings, and it's possible you may only fully realize the real issue as you talk about the issue. And, if you are certain what you would like to change, you are much more likely to get it. The more genuinely you express yourself, the more truly you talk about what's going on for you, the more intimate you will be as a couple.
Step 2 - work together on a practical self-help program for treating male sexual problems. There are a lot to choose from on the internet and a brief search is often enough to find something that is right for you. The important features you should to look for are: genuine testimonials, a money-back guarantee, and an author who is a qualified expert in the field. I have proven in more than 12 years' work men with sexual problems that self-help treatment programs work just as well as clinical counseling for the majority of men, so long as they are extremely ready to up their sexual performance.
As you can imagine, this is not helpful for the couple's relationship, especially if the topic is never openly talked about. In most cases, however, the guilt produced by sexual problems is massively stressful, and the man and woman frequently carry on with this important topic unresolved. So if this is happening to you, what can be done? The great news is - you can indeed change things!
Step 1 - you must talk about it from your heart: in other words, you tell your partner what you are feeling. Unfortunately, in reality our research proves as few as 10% of couples talk to each other about difficulties with lovemaking. So, to help you discuss your thoughts, feelings and emotions around sex, we have some tips to assist you:
1) Talk about your feelings - please don't try the tactic of avoiding responsibility by blaming your partner. Being able to listen openly without reacting emotionally means you will meet much less stress - and your partner is probably going to be much more able to hear what you say without getting angry.
2) Don't project your feelings - having the courage to accept that you are in this together is essential to eliminating mutual anger and mistrust. Only when you are able to accept that your partner's actions and feelings are a real response to the situation, and that they have a right to feel that way, can you start to respect each other as you truly are.
3) Don't engage in self-criticism. Putting things right is more constructive. This may involve getting the help of a therapist. Or it may mean something as basic as making a time slot each week to speak to your wife or husband about what is "up" for you.
4) If you have difficulty discussing sexual problems rehearse the things you want to raise before you start. Being prepared is essential in achieving the respect of your partner. It's also important to know what is unacceptable to you in any discussion about sex. That way you are be much more likely to avoid concessions you regret.
5) Be clear about what you are saying. It's often difficult to work out what's causing our thoughts and feelings, and it's possible you may only fully realize the real issue as you talk about the issue. And, if you are certain what you would like to change, you are much more likely to get it. The more genuinely you express yourself, the more truly you talk about what's going on for you, the more intimate you will be as a couple.
Step 2 - work together on a practical self-help program for treating male sexual problems. There are a lot to choose from on the internet and a brief search is often enough to find something that is right for you. The important features you should to look for are: genuine testimonials, a money-back guarantee, and an author who is a qualified expert in the field. I have proven in more than 12 years' work men with sexual problems that self-help treatment programs work just as well as clinical counseling for the majority of men, so long as they are extremely ready to up their sexual performance.
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